More about Attachment Parenting
Yes, we are a place of closeness. You don’t have to worry that we will train your child using punishment, rewards, or tit-for-tat transactions. There have never been and will never be stickers, stamps, motivational boards, “quiet corners,” isolation places, or any other behavioral methods here. We want to build relationships with children and their parents based on trust, openness, honest communication, and respect for each other’s needs. This is rooted in our deepest beliefs, and we cannot imagine acting any other way.
You don’t have to worry that your child in our kindergarten will be exposed to methods and techniques that you avoid and do not accept at home.
Yes, you will have time and space for a gradual, non-violent adaptation in the company of a parent, grandmother, grandfather, or nanny. You will have our support in this process. No, no one will snatch a crying child from your hands, ignore their requests for a phone call to mommy, deceive them, or confuse their frozen fear with perfect adaptation to a new situation.
No, no one will force a child to eat or use „the airplane” method of feeding. We will create an atmosphere during meals that encourages eating and trying new things, but we will not resort to promising dessert in exchange for eating vegetables.
Of course, we do not have mandatory nap times, which for many parents of our children are still a vivid and unpleasant memory from their own childhood. Yes, every child can rest or even take a nap during the day if they have such a need.
Attachment Parenting is a term coined by American pediatrician William Sears, describing a parenting philosophy based on the principles of attachment theory in developmental psychology, which states that a child forms a strong emotional bond with their caregivers that influences their entire future life.
It is worth remembering that this is not some “modern parenting theory” or empty “stress-free parenting” rhetoric, but the oldest human way of being with offspring, practiced by our ancestors, which enabled our species to survive and thrive. Until the specific social conditions of the Industrial Revolution era and the takeover of child-parent relationships by so-called experts caused a loss of faith in our own ability to understand and meet a child’s needs, no one would have thought that an infant “manipulates” parents instead of simply communicating their essential needs (security, closeness, nourishment, etc.).
The pillars of Attachment Parenting are primarily:
- Sensitively and empathetically responding to the child’s needs.
- Being sensitive to the child’s signals, treating them seriously as ways of communication and bonding by the child, rather than as tools for “manipulation” or “coercion.”
- Taking care of the parents’ needs in a way that does not compromise the vital interests of the child at a given stage of development, but allows parents not to lose themselves in the whirlwind of responsibilities and not to forget the joys of parenting.
- Avoiding “child trainers.”
Attachment parenting teaches how to value the advice that the environment usually bombards young parents with and assertively reject those that promote a harsh, radical, and completely unnatural parenting style that dictates adherence to imposed rules rather than observing the child and responding to the needs of all family members. The style, briefly referred to as “let them cry it out” (in relation to infants) or “all children cry in preschool for the first few months,” does not bring long-term benefits but often results in irreparable losses, both in the mutual relationship and the mental health of the entire family.